Passion

I have opened up my life in new and interesting ways, and as a result have found something I didn't know I had lost. Working through the Artist Way book - I finally made it past week 6 and am open to the idea that I wish to push forward and really learn what it means to become fully enmeshed in my artwork and have the focus to pursue it. What I have found is my passion, my ability to be in love with life again. I'm not sure where I lost it, or where it went - but finding it again I feel so alive, so fully in the moment. Everything revolves around spending time making life fun and bright and shiny again. I don't mean by buying new things - but in fact by making new things. To take the old drab look and spice it up to be more myself. To go into cohorts with my husband and make our house more about our life and less about the crap to person ratio. When I put color to paper, or words in sentences I feel a sense of freedom. Kinda like you imagine a child who has just escaped their clothing and is running freely through the house with that unmistakable giggle that rings of "look what I'm getting away with"

I do - I feel when I create something that I imagine in my mind that I'm getting away with something. I had so convinced myself that I couldn't draw without a picture. Life became dull and drab because the reality of what that meant was I couldn't create at all without a visual prompt, and if my photography sucked (and it's not my strong suit) then I couldn't create at all. It was a nice little catch 22 trap of procrastination designed specifically to keep me trapped and blocked.

So I've moved on, now images are flying out of my heart with wings and a desire to be created and seen by others. I use pictures for reference for shadows and shapes - but my artwork is freely taking shape on it's own. I have NO CLUE what this means or where it will take me. I do know that I'm enjoying this ride to it's fullest and when the car stops for me to rest after a big project I accept the down time and get back in line for the next ride!

Am I scared - a little. This is seriously uncharted territory. However I am choosing to take life with the perspective of an explorer - blocks in my path are just another way to hone my skills to find a way past and deeper into uncharted territory. My life has new meaning and purpose now - and that involves pure playful creativity in it's rawest of forms.

I'm curious where I'll end up when the ride is truly over. I hope as I come across others that they will see the path I've taken, and have the courage to explore their own paths. It would be downright awesome if the world had the opportunity to forge ahead with their true desires as creatives and the faith to walk the path!

Take a moment to watch a child at play, take note of how carefree they are - find out how you can feel that free again!

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